ICE, ICE, BABY
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From Jay-Z’s Michael Jordan fascination to Lil Wayne’s recent mixtape track, “Sportscenter,” rappers love a good sports reference. But when it comes to rhyming about the major leagues, HOCKEY gets left out in the cold. With the NHL season back in full swing (trust us), VIBE shoots for ten reasons why pimp cups will never be Stanley Chris Yuscavage

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10 The National Football League has commentator John Madden, the National Basketball Association has Marv Albert, and the National Hockey League has Barry Melrose. Guess which one used to sport a mullet.

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Barry Melrose

9 Any vehicle as big as a Zamboni needs something chromed or customized before it leaves the garage.

8 Who’s going to name-drop (Alexei) Kovalev, (Sergei) Nemchinov, or (Sergei) Zubov? Do you know what rhymes with Kovalchuk?

7 There’s no such thing as an Air Gretzky.

6 The Edmonton Oilers went to last season’s NHL Stanley Cup Finals. Where’s Edmonton?

5 Hockey rules only make sense to Canadians.

4 A major fighting penalty gets you five minutes in the box— and no headlines the next day.

3 When Willie O’Ree debuted with the NHL’s Boston Bruins in 1958, he was the first African-American player in the league. Almost fifty years later there are fewer than twenty active black pros. Do the math.

2 When the U.S. hockey team knocked off the Soviet Union at the 1980 Winter Olympic Games (the “Miracle on Ice”), Run and DMC were still in high school.

1SERIOUSLY,
WHO ICE-
SKATES?
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THE BIG TICKET

Don’t be stuck watching games on HDTV all winter long Here’s a myth buster: You can get tickets to the big game. Yes, you , reclining in the La-Z-Boy with nacho cheese stains on your white tee. And while it ain’t always as easy as eBay (due to online commerce restrictions), you don’t have to know somebody who knows somebody to land tix either. Whether you’re looking to score floor seats to an NBA game or a pair of nosebleeds at the Super Bowl, ticket sites StubHub ( stubhub.com) and TickCo ( tickco.com) offer point-and-click access to the year’s biggest sporting events—provided you’ve got your paper stacked. From February’s Super Bowl XLI tickets (currently selling for $2,600 a pop) to passes for next month’s college football BCS National Championship (priced at just over $800), sellers offer extra spots—typically those leftover by season ticket holders— and the sites collect a commission. See you courtside. Alex Woodson

S TANLE Y CUP: STRINGER/CANADA/REUTERS/CORBIS; MELROSE: BRUCE BENNETT/GETTY IMAGES; O’REE: BRUCE BENNE TT/GE TTY IMAGES; ZAMBONI: DAVE SANDFORD/GETTY IMAGES; FIGHT: MAT SLOCUM/AP; TICKET: TAMMY MCALLISTER